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How do I start my own kingdom without being immediately crushed by other factions?

First time playing bannerlord or anything mount & blade related, and I've been following the main quest and having a great time fighting my way up in the world. I opted to make my own non-imperial kingdom rather than join one, and my first fief was Balagrad (which I took from rebels). From Balagrad, I then moved to conquer lands of the northern empire, which is what the main quest pushes for. I took Epicrotea and fought off Lucon's army at the gates, where I gained my second (much more prosperous) fief. The problem now is that the Vlandians have shown hyper-aggression towards me, and it is impossible for me to do anything about them. They've taken over the majority of the western half of the map through endless warfare, are the superpower of the game, and for every man I have, they have 12 more. I have 50 relation with Derthert, my family is married into a powerful Vlandian clan, my character is of Vlandian origin, and the game difficulty is set on normal, but they ins...

Poll for mod idea; Timeline and Era

I hope that this post reach to mod creators; is it possible to create something that changes the gameplay of sandbox each timeline and era? You are the first in line with your ancestors, gameplay is more primitive like style until you die and you take control of your children but time changes and it gets more modern as it goes by. Same goes for fantasy style where magic are kinda basic and very foundation of power, limited yet raw power. Children possessing the inherited even a glimpse of powers as future generation goes by and magic, troops, politics get more indepth as time goes by. This create a refreshing take on the game. Can even create an event type apocalyptic, pandemic style for certain era. Maybe even a simple mod for multiple mods get activate/deactivate as time/year goes by (yeah bugs and stuff are probably the problem with this but this kind of mod is more focus on troubleshooting bugs to each era of mods. certain mods are only allowed or specific mod)

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