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Vanilla Xbox Nord - fun suggestions

So I gave in to buying Bannerlord after they removed from game pass. The game is very much a love hate relationship, nothing else seems to hit that spot. The updates the last year has given me more faith in the developers. Managed to order it cheaper on Amazon if anyone was having the same issue. One day I will convert to pc and finally have mods. Anyone got any ideas on how to keep my nord run fun? I’m really trying to avoid getting into that tedious kingdom/vassal never ending war. I’m currently thinking I’ll take a rebelled town near the nords when one pops ups, then just start a war with aserai and valandians as a clan and keep going by boat to raid and shit. Hopefully weakening them so much I might be able to take them as an independent clan. I’d appreciate some of your fun ideas for vanilla console. Would be cool to eventually form a kingdom and just create companion clans, marrying of my family to them, and instead of expanding just hold down our area till we are strong. Bit of ...
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What should I do here?

I’m a vasal with the Khuzaits and I feel like the AI is not doing me any favors. We were at war with Sturgia and the Aserai at the same time which was a nightmare because everyone was running north and south. Not at war with Sturgia anymore but as soon as we made peace with them Monchug went and declared war with the western empire.

I have 15 fiefs and they all border the western empire. So while every place I own is getting attacked Monchug and all the other assholes have been fighting over Shibal Zumr Castle. One side takes it and back and forth so most of the army is over there. And I’m in the same situation over at Onica castle. I own it but they take it and then I take it back. No one is getting anywhere. I want to go on the offensive and take Zeonica but I just don’t have enough people and I don’t think I can get anymore. Any tips for this stalemate?

And where do all their troops keep coming from? They keep coming with 1100 troop armies and I keep destroying them, shouldn’t they run out of troops or something?

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